Page 33 - James Pirie News

Warmest greetings of this festive season and best wishes for happiness in the New Year

 It’s now too late for us send out your last minute Christmas presents and time for us to go and spend a festive time with our families so all we can do here at James Pirie is to wish all of our valued customers a happy Christmas and a prosperous new year and in the words of Charles Dickens’s character Tiny Tim...

T’was Caviare to the General. –

But...Well Digested in the Scenes, Set Down with as Much Modesty as Cunning

Oh it is such a dreary night with Storm Caroline howling around the house as I type my blog  that upon the news that Scotland is to get its first caviar farm my thoughts first turn to Shakespeare’s broody plan Hamlet. But forsooth it is true, plans have been submitted for a caviar farm on Loch...

Trains Stopped by Rogue Trampoline –

True Story

Sung to the tune of the traditional sea shanty.

As we were a-travelling  from Glasgow at night
Hoping to buy our presents alright,

In the windy old weather, stormy old weather
When the wind blows we all pull together
When the wind blows we all pull together

We sighted a trampoline , blown out of the garden
Said "Now, you old skipper, our delays you...

Mackintosh’s Masterpiece -

Hill House Dissolving Like an Aspirin in a Glass of Water

It is the fault of that new fangled concrete, well it was new when Scotland’s design superstar  Charles Rennie Mackintosh’s  built his masterpiece Hill House on  a hill in the wet and windy west coast at Helensburgh and the climate have been attacking it since the very first day. As regular readers know I live...

Queensferry Teething Troubles –

New Bridge Already Need Repairs

Oh yes opened with a fanfare and closed with a whisper that’s what’s going to happen to the Queensferry Crossing and thousands of motorists face new delays after the government announced it would have to partially close while minor construction defects are fixed. Oh William Topaz McGonagall where are you when I need a handy bridge rhyme...

Snakes on a Plane! –

No Snake in a Van

I know an enormous number of people who have a fear of snakes, not just the venomous ones, but all the slithery things and lizards and toads and frogs too. That’s why whenever they offer you one of those animal encounters you should grab it with both hands for the nervous amongst your parties to get to grips with nature and particularly snakes. We took a whole...

Kill or Cure –

Hangover Cures to Die from(!)

Long before Santa parks his sleigh on the roof and wonders why you haven’t got a chimney in the block of flats or modern bungalow you might be feeling the effects of the dreaded office party. The lassie on the supermarket checkout today said it was theirs at 8pm this evening when they’d start tucking in to the turkey and that they had it nice and early as...

Sir Andy Splits from Ivan –

Tennis Star Has Second Break Up

Well I suppose it had to happen and Ivan Lendl and Sir Andy Murray have split before the tennis star’s comeback at the Australian Open championship in January. The wife and I will be there at all sorts of unsocial hours watching it on the yahoo ap. The break up looks to be friendly and by mutual agreement it has come at horrible time for Andy...

Happy Saint Andrew’s Day –

The patron saint of Scotland is also the patron of Cyprus, Greece, Romania, Russia, Ukraine, Bulgaria, the Ecumenical Patriarchate of Constantinople, San Andres Island, Colombia, Saint Andrew, Barbados and Tenerife. Indeed one of my sons is called Andrew, so it is a good day. The name Andrew is Greek and means manly and brave.  Apostle Saint Andrew was the brother of Saint...

Roger Where’s Your Troosers –

Murray in ‘See You Jimmy’ Hat

To wear the kilt is my delight
It is not wrong I know it's right
The Murray Brothers would get a fright
If they saw me in the troosers

Recently I wrote about Andy Murray’s hip problem, but this month he’s shaken that off for a while to play Swiss Ace Roger Federer in an exhibition match to raise money for charities Unicef and Young People’s...